Samples

Dr. Steven Maybell, Ph.D. has written two books on parenting, which are listed here: “Raising Respectful Kids in a Rude World,” (Prima 2001)and “Calming the Family Storm: Anger Management for Moms, Dads, And All the Kids” co-authored by Steven A. Maybell, Ph.D. (Impact 2004).

This interactive resource uses Lessons, Audio, and Video examples to explain and model Effective Parenting Methods …

This interactive parenting resource is a Strength Based and Prevention Based resource, which means the focus of

• the Lessons, and
• the audio, and
• the video examples

is toward teaching you, and your other family members, how to think about
Strengths and
Preventions.

Question:

How do you get the behaviors you want from your children?

Answer:

• By focusing on what each child does well-what their Strengths are;
• By learning how to “parent” toward their natural ” Goals “;
• By learning how to strengthen ” better behavior ,” rather than re-enforce Mis-behavior.

For parents whose child may have a SED (Severe Emotional Disturbance/Disability) or a mental illness, or a cognititve challenge, or a physical challenge , these ideas and suggestions are even more important-because knowing how to be prepared for challenging behavior, knowing how to be prepared for parenting that requires an extra amount of creativity, tenacity, and love is precisely what helps you cope and feel successful as a parent.

The Lessons are based on the table: Understanding Purpose: The Goals of Child/Teen Misbehavior by
Steven A. Maybell, Ph.D., who is the Clinical Director (retired) of a university counseling center in Seattle, Washington. The Lessons also present ideas and suggestions for “how to” skills, how to apply the ideas presented in the Lessons, which I hope will become immediate, effective, parenting skills for you.

The Lessons present six big ideas or themes:
the GOALS of the child,
the Child’s Behavior
the Child’s Belief
How the Parent Feels,
the Parent’s Mistaken Reaction,
and Effective Parenting Methods (Responses and Preventions).
The Child’s GOALs are presented as Seeking Attention, Service, Power, Revenge, and Proof of being Inadequate or Avoidance.

(Dr. Maybell provides restricted permission only to this website for presenting this table or chart. If you find this table or chart (Understanding Purpose: The Goals of Child/Teen Misbehavior) anywhere else, it is presented there without Dr. Maybell’s permission.)

Example of How Each Six Lessons or Theme Pages is Organized:

Each page is organized in the following manner:

1. The Lesson
a. The Audio (may be more than one)
b. The Video (may be more than one
2. The Next Lessson
a. The Audio (may be more than one)
b. The Video (may be more than one)
3. The Next Lesson …for all six Lessons….

A portion of one Lesson, an example of an Audio explanation, a Welcome video from Michael Kennedy, a video on the benefits of learning Effective Parenting Methods, and a Welcome video from Dr. Steven A. Maybell are below:

Another way to gain a child’s compliance…
is to request their help with tasks that they are good at or they enjoy. Notice the importance of not combining Special Time and Opportunities To Contribute. The problem is when a parent hopes to have some Special Time with a child, while completing chores–chores that the child may not really enjoy or be skilled in doing. The result can be frustration for the parent and frustration for the child, which can then lead to a Parent’s Mistaken Reaction of anger and disappointment.
(Take a look at this Lesson below to learn more about Opportunities To Contribute:   Example: Prevention and Contribution [7:45] (lesson)).